It only took a few days into the new year for me to finally add “blog more frequently” to the list of things I really should do in 2023. Well, four days and a pile of laundry I don’t want to fold. Yeah. I am currently staring down a heap of laundry at the foot of the bed. Laundry that came out of its second cycle. Laundry that includes table cloths from my “epic” Christmas Eve Feast of the Seven Fishes.
Here’s where I’ll note; I am far from reconnecting to my Catholic roots. Yet, I love fish, friends, and an excuse to use my fine china. On the other side of that “who am I” coin sits my formal event. It is as close as I get to a Solstice celebration without making my definitively book religion friends think I’m a total weirdo.
Where on Earth was I going with this?
New Year!
But 2022 is hanging on like a, well we won’t go there. We’ll stick with that it is still clinging. I want to move on to bigger and better things in 2023. I am in a lot of ways, but there are some lingering blehs.
So, as I struggle to find just the right means to move forward and make big waves! In comes the need to dust off the old blog. Give me a little credit though. This time it’s only been a few months instead of a few years.
I convinced myself to finally get back into my YouTube videos by dedicating every one of these tarot break down videos to Mary. She swears she is going to make a deck of tarot cards as well this year with the rest of the tarot class. She is considerably more behind on the meanings and symbols of the cards though. So, I am making videos to help her out. It really does help to be “talking” to someone about this, instead of into the void.
So, yeah, videos, laundry, more writing, and oh so many other things.
While I don’t really want to drop to my knees in front of every person I know and *beg* for people to read my serial stories, watch my videos, talk about my classes, buy my books, and pay me what I’m worth; I’m starting to feel like that’s the best option I’ve got.
It’s not that bad. Not really. But I have been foolishly watching the wins of other creators and wondering where I need to sell my soul to get close to the abundance pouring over them. Comparing yourself to others; don’t do that. And most of the time I don’t. But when I do I feel like it's only fair to confess it. I’m still figuring it all out too. And maybe that’s where I was going with this.
“Happy” New Year just isn’t cutting it right now. I’m good with; “Contented” New Year. Even “It Was Worth the Effort” New Year. And that’s the other thing. Every year for the whole of this millennium has had a word, a name if you will. This one, well, it hasn’t told me yet. So, how does it expect me to know what to do with it, if it doesn’t even have a name?
Until it coughs one up I’ll plug along. I’ll write my silly stories. I’ll make my weird little videos. I’ll dance my fool heart out. Because when I stop waiting for the world to see me, stop comparing myself to everyone around me, that’s when I see why I really do all that I do… because I love it, and I can’t imagine a life without it. It makes this whole mad journey worth it.
Huh. Maybe that’s all it is this year.
The Journey.
